Enough political ranting… it’s Biggest Loser time! And, back to my traditional habits, I’m eating chocolate. In my defence, I had a very (very) small dinner. Regardless, TBL is going to my favourite spot in the US: the Grand Canyon. That is a heck of a hike people. Trust me on this. Even the flat part is hard because it’s 7,000 feet in the air.

Travelling is my own personal diet hell. But enough about that… Shellay was on the crack wanting to stay in a hotel and swim and spend time in the hot tub. It’s the biggest loser, people! Not the best spa vacation televised weekly! (Did you feel the pain for the Orange team, not fitting in their seats? That sucks, people. It sucks. My hips didn’t touch the armrests on my last flight. That was a huge victory for me, let me tell you.

So, to the convenience store challenge. Did I tell you guys about crying in walmart while standing in front of a giant display of chocolate? Yeah. This challenge is going to suck. (I’m just going to note that she didn’t even have to say “string cheese” before I hollered out “80 calories!”. Yeah, I’m just that snack-savvy.

Um, if you were at the GRAND CANYON do you not thinkg you could come up with some way to raise your heartrate? Let me give you five:

1) Walking uphill or on an uneven trail
2) Lunge walking
3) Intervals
4) Climbing up and over rocks or through slot canyons
5) Swimming

(I have more, like short sprints, cone runs, use of those medicine balls as weights and kettlebells, etc. But I digress.)

You don’t need appliances or trainers to kick your ass in the grand fricking canyon, people. You missed out on 80% of the experience by not doing anything while you were there. Sigh. (I’m so glad Bob called them out on their lack of motivation and made their last chance workout what they could have done.)

On the kayak event: don’t you think an RV is kind of a passive prize? And, that is truly the hardest type of kayak to sit in. I would have kicked ass in that challenge.

Did you notice that Jillian fried the chicken they cooked? Interesting. I’ve never fried a chicken breast before. How long would that take? Does it taste better than grilling or baking? Could you see what she used to fry it in?

While I get through some of the “blah blah blah” crying time, I popped on over to Wordcount to see how popular my name is as a word. “Kerry” is the 14,903 most popular word, coming in just before burglars and just after combustion. Could we make a sentence there? For those of you who don’t know, the noun version of “kerry” is a breed of small, black dairy cattle. Yes, mum, I curse you for that.

So, there’s no voting today. One family is below the yellow line, and one of that family is going home. I’m calling it right now – yellow Dad is going down. To the results:

  • Red team loses 15 pounds. Good for them! Phil blasted through that 300 pound barrier. Good on him!
  • Brown loses eight pounds. Poor Brady – so close to the weight starting with a 2, but not quite there.
  • Pink team loses nine pounds. They did good!
  • Orange (Ed looks pretty good, doesn’t he?) loses 16 pounds. They had a good week! His weight starts with a 2! Good for him!
  • Purple (wearing a LOT of lip gloss) loses nine pounds which is better than a kick in the ass with a frozen boot.
  • Yellow loses five pounds, because the dad actually gained two pounds. Oh, that has to suck. What do they do? Let Coleen continue, as a good chance at winning, or let Jerry go on, because he obviously is in the worst shape of the two of them?

And Jerry’s going home. I hope the other teams pull together to support Coleen. She needs a Bernie (since she’s clearly in the Britany role this year).

So, now we’ve had this wrinkle. Do you think they’ll be voting like that from now on? What do you think of this approach? Is the biggest loser about the game, or about the experience? What’d you think of tonight’s ep? Doesn’t Jerry look great today? He looks 30 years younger, doesn’t he? My god, imagine being able to show so dramatically the health benefits of losing that weight? GOOD for him! He rocks!!

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