These are the chronicles of the sleep patterns of Kerry… sleep date February 1, 2010.

Man, I am a serious nerd. Sometimes I just can’t hide it. (I’m about to lose control and I think I like it, I like it!) (hat tip: Pointer Sisters.)

Funny how when I’m really tired I get one of three ways: melancholy (and the infinite sadness – though technically billy corgan says that’s “mellon collie”), silly (which I am right now), or cranky as cranky gets. My pop culture ways tend to show through a lot more when I’m the silly variety. My roommate when I lived in Washington was always astounded at how many times in a day I could turn a line of conversation into a part of a popular song. It’s because we worked over 12 hours a day and never slept.

I’m tired. I’m overcaffeinated. Today my assistant (and dear friend) came into my office, took one look at me and my desk and said “I hope that’s the last diet coke you’re having today”. I told her to take it away (and come again another day – and now I’ve degenerated to nursery rhymes – this makes a lot more sense with sound, even if I can’t sing all that well). Last night I took a lot of drugs to get to sleep, and I still didn’t fall asleep til well over 2 hours after I started trying, and then I woke up less than 6 hours later. Over three nights, I think I slept 15 hours, plus 2 short naps.

I’m trying a different technique tonight (it’s now 90 minutes after I turned out the light, and one hour after two phone calls rocked me (all night long, yea yeahhhhhh) out of a near snooze.

I like to call this patented technique NotWearingGlassesSoEyesFeelTired ™. I learned this technique oddly enough in reverse. Back in the day, when I was young and foolish, I didn’t have to wear my glasses all the time. Except, when I was hungover, wearing my glasses made me feel less tired. Now that I’m old, the reverse is totally true.

Do I think this’ll work? Dunno. Can I see properly? Hell no. Have I made a lot of typos? Sorry for that!

Anyway, the electronic cone of silence didn’t work so well tonight, but it was a rough day at work and I didn’t do it very well. I’m out of practice. But, I will persevere (and survive, I will survive!). Tomorrow might be the night where I pop into bed at 9PM and easily drift into sleep. Or Wednesday. Definitely by Friday. Don’t you think? (isn’t it ironic? – and speaking of total alanis morrissette non-sequitors: Beyonce doing You Oughta Know at the Grammys? Crazy.)